The memory of my deceased family member haunts my dreams. I often felt that she wanted to consume my body and lived in my shadow, and all of the shadows of my living family. So is she really gone. Or has she just decayed as a living immediate presence and dispersed into the unknown? I can't fully answer that but I can only pose the possibilities of life that is not subjected to the absolutism of death and dying.
Her memory continuously resurrects her into the world of the living.....
Relationships, particularly romantic relationships, beg a similar question. Does a break-up mark the death of a connection between two people? The pain of any relationship is the fact that what was alive and living within us in our connection with the other person, either slowly decayed or abruptly disappeared. This can be represented in a immediate disappearance (we don't see that person anymore) or the leveling down of all emotions that were so alive during the relationship. It is almost as if I don't exist anymore.
But is this the end of me? No there is rebirth! And that which who I was with him lives on in me, he and who I was is a ever fixed mark impressed on my soul. This is all too dramatic for a Wednesday afternoon.......
